Joke Evolution

Morrigan has learned to tell a joke. Now she has been telling jokes for some time but they weren't very funny. They all went something like this, "Why did the chicken cross the road? Eyeball!" At which point she and her sister would burst into hysterical laughter. [Maybe I should correct my previous statement, I didn't find them very funny.] But the other day, she busted out with "Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9." Clearly we are not planning a sitcom for her yet but it is much improved over the eyeball or bonklehead punchlines.

I was cleared to go back to the gym. All I have to say is OUCH! I ran for the first time in 3 weeks & my legs are killing me. So if you see me hobbling about town, you will know why.

Tim is working all weekend (do you see a pattern here?) so the kids and I are off to the gym and then a picnic at the park. The really unfortunate thing is, cue the violins, several docs in the ER have resigned in the last week so we can expect more work weekends. Bummer.

E's New Rig

I knew I had done right by the little guy when Tim asked if they made this outfit in his size.

Eion Speaks

More accurately, Eion speaks more and more. The other day, Tim came home E ran over to him. Tim picked him up & hugged him. Eion responded by cheering "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy!"

The gals and E were having M&Ms at the kitchen island. Eion dropped the last half dozen or so of his on the ground. His sisters, in a very vulturesque manner, swooped in on them yelling "Let's eat them!" Eion, who has mercifully not mastered exiting his stool, stood on it screaming "Mine, mine! Get down! Get down!"

Morrigan went to the chess club at school this morning. I will be very interested to see how this works out. When Tim tried to teach her in the past, she refused to use the rules and made up her own game. Maybe they will have more luck. And while they are at it, maybe they can teach her to pronounce it "chess" rather than "chest."

Maggie had her three year doctor appointment on Monday. She is in perfect health but was, like her sister, referred to an Ophthalmologist. They showed me the growth charts and I asked, "So Maggie is in the 105th percentile for height?" Turns out she is beyond that but that is as high as they chart. Kid is going to be taller than me by 1st grade!

Tim passed his lasik screening so it is new improved eyes all the way around! He is going to wait until after the 1st of the year too. They have some brand-new laser that corrects people to better than 20/20 most of the time. What a switch that will be!

Maggie's Birthday Party

Maggie had her big princess (and prince - she has allot of male friends!) tea party on Saturday. (Photos available in upper flikr badge.) She & Morrigan were very excited to break out their new birthday dresses and of course, tiaras! We had it at the Club and there were about 20 kids there. They served tea sandwiches that were pb&j and grilled cheese without crusts. And they got to drink apple juice out of real tea cups! After cake, the kids ran wild, literally. One of her friends, Stella, said, "Let's play chase!" And the screaming and running was on. Fortunately, we were the only people there and their antics were generally well received or at least tolerated. Only small glitch was that I forgot glue for the craft, make your own princess or pirate hat. But the events coordinator came through for me & found some. Maggie had a fantastic time and said it was the best birthday party ever.

Maggie Turns Three

Today was Maggie's 3rd birthday. (Pictured above with prized birthday gift.) She got to be Daddy's helper making pancakes and took cupcakes to school. Tomorrow is the big princess tea party. Full coverage available later this weekend!

We found Eion a killer pirate Halloween costume. But for a time we entertained the idea of dressing him as a drunken sailor (his unsteady gait serving as the perfect prop.) Tim determined no drunken sailor costume is complete without a jug marked "XXX." So he googled "xxx jugs." That was awesome. You can only imagine what came up in the images category.

But the big news of the day is I had my eyes tested to see if I can get lasik surgery and much to my surprise, I can! I am psyched. I have been blind as a bat for 26 years and would love to ditch my glasses and contacts. [For those tracking my elective surgeries, this will be number three. That's right baby - I'm fixing it all. I'll be like the bionic woman.] I have to wait until January so we can use Tim's healthcare savings account but what is another few months after being blind so long? Tim, on the other hand, wants to get it done immediately. I think he just wants to go first. His test is Monday. We'll see if he qualifies to be the new, improved Tim!

Sparkle & Kelsey

The girls have been begging for a pet. As I am absolutely not interested in another living thing under my care, I said we could get goldfish. So two weeks ago we bought Sparkle and Kelsey, names courtesy of Morrigan. In spite of routine bowl cleanings and proper feeding, Sparkle immediately developed a nasty head ulcer. Online research found that injections from a vet would be needed to fix this aliment. Sorry Sparkle, it's curtains for you! But currently she lives on. Yesterday Morrigan said, "Look! Sparkle is taking a nap on the bowl floor." A few taps on the bowl & she was back in action. Morrigan asked if the fish was going to die. I responded that her days were numbered. Was Morrigan sad? Not so much. She was mostly concerned that she gets to flush the fish rather than Maggie.

It's All Worth It

Yesterday I told Eion that I loved him and he answered "I love you too." Made that long day without Daddy all worth it.

Valuable Life Lessons

I have learned an important lesson this week. If one is planning on having surgery and being heavily medicated, it is a colossally bad idea to send out invitations to a party. Maggie's birthday party is next Saturday and I sent out the invites a few days before I had surgery. People have been RSVPing for the last week. Unfortunately, I have not been all there for at least half of that week, thank you Vicodin. So I keep asking people if they are coming & they let me know that they told me days ago. Or my favorite to date, the friend who had already responded twice, in person both times. What on earth can you say to that? "Oh yeah. Well I'm trying something new this year. I'll ask you daily in case you want to change your mind." So I have to let the Club know soon how many kids are coming. I'll just ask all the parents again. "Please forgive me Mrs. X, I was wacked out of my gourd on Vicodin last week. Do you mind RSVPing for a second (or third!) time?"

Lucky Number Three

Looks like three is my number this week. I placed number three in poker both Saturday (out of 6) and yesterday (out of 11.) I also have three eBay auctions going that are all doing outstanding. Kind of eerie huh? Well not actually that much evidence but I am sticking with three this week!

Doug & Nancy came to visit for a day on the way home from Michigan (see above - check out Maggie's angry chimp look again.) It was a short stay but we were happy to see them. Morrigan discovered that Grandpa is a sucker for little girls that want pennies for their piggy banks.

I had my stitches removed yesterday so life is much more comfortable for me. I can drive again but still can't work out or lift anything over 10lbs. Which has been interesting today since Tim returned to work after being my nursemaid for six days. The girls I knew would be good. It was Eion "trouble" McKernan who would be problematic. But he was great today & climbed into the car (rather than making a break for it) and walked into school and up the stairs to his classroom (again, rather than making a break for it!) I do miss Tim's care. I will have to be like that tv show The Swan & just keep having surgeries so he is home to care for me! [You should already realize this but I am totally kidding ;)]

Recovery Week

After last week's prolific posts, I have been quiet this week as I'm recovering from the outpatient surgery I had on Friday. I wasn't sure if I was going to put this out there but what the hell. I am not a very secretive person! Before I go on, a disclaimer for faint of heart: just skip this post. I guarantee you that when you're done, you'll say to yourself, "That is really more than I need to know about Katie." Now the rest of you are thinking, this is good, I'd better read on....

I had a breast lift on Friday or as I like to call it, phase one of the new fake rack. My original plan was to get implants but the surgeon said I was too far gone and I had to have a lift first. The children had literally sucked the life out of me! So the lift was Friday and later in October is the "enhancement." I feel good and am pretty much only taking ibuprofen for the pain. The Vicodin were fun but they made it hard to get anything done. My stitches come out on Thursday which will be sure to disappoint the girls. They love to look at "Mommy's big boo boo." Tim has been an absolute champ taking time off work & managing the triple team. He has been cooking, cleaning and chauffeuring me around. I have to have surgery more often!

So now you know! Clearly, I have not been very secretive about this and many people in Roanoke know. It is hilarious to see people for the first time post surgery. Women tend to look at my chest right away. Men, on the other hand, look me right in the eye the entire time.

The picture above of Morrigan in her new glasses is obviously unrelated to the post. Open as I may be, I won't be posting pictures related to this post!

Morrigan's First Day of Kindergarten

Morrigan had her first day of Kindergarten on Wednesday. The teacher asked us to walk them to class the first day. So we all get out of the car and walk up to the school. I stop to get out the camera & Morrigan just takes off toward her classroom. With Maggie & Eion in tow, I go chasing after her. Although I'm sure she would have made it to the classroom just fine, I was not about to be the one parent that didn't walk her kid back!

She settled in easily & gave her teacher, Mr. Richards, the picture she made for him. When I picked her up after school, she was thrilled with the longer day (they are there until 3:40) and so was I!

Now I know there are those who giggle about my perpetually matching children & I have to go on record here & say it is not just me who wants them to match. The girls ask to - I swear. We were looking for Halloween costumes. Morrigan wants to be Cinderella. I suggested Maggie be Snow White or Sleeping Beauty. They both insisted that Maggie has to be Cinderella too. Morrigan actually broke into tears the other day when Maggie had on an outfit that she didn't have. Then again, maybe this is worse as it means my compulsions have worn off on my kids...

Eion's First Day of School

Eion had his first day of school today. The little fella did great. I set him down & he toddled off to play. He wouldn't even look up for a picture. I said "Ok, goodbye Eion" and I was not even on his radar. When I picked him up, his teachers said he was a bit fussy on and off throughout the day. Now these girls are young, don't have kids and I am sure this is their first teaching job. I didn't want to break it to them that that is just what 1 1/2 year olds do. They'll figure it out.

Lots of posts today with updates on school. I'll post again later with info on Morrigan's first day of Kindergarten.

Maggie's Red Shoes

As promised, a picture of Maggie in the red shoes that are leaving a trail of glitter through the house. Check out the angry chimp face too. She is so her father's child.

Maggie's 1st Day of School

Maggie had her first day of school on Tuesday. She was very excited about going but got a bit shy when we arrived & started crying. I had a doctor's appointment so I had to scoot and felt pretty bad about leaving her in tears. Incidentally, I left her sister at home in tears because she wanted to go to school but didn't start until Wednesday. Clearly, there is no winning for me. When I picked Maggie up, her teachers said she did great & she told me what fun she had. She did much better today at drop off and was very excited that she was the snack helper.

After school Tuesday, Morrigan had an eye doctor's appointment. She failed her vision screening at her 5 year checkup. Surprising no one, she needs to get glasses. With myopic parents like me & Tim, the kids really have no hope. I told Dr. Facciani to expect us back soon with the other two.

Eion, the little f***er, has added opening the door to the garage (leading to the driveway, the street & certain death) to his skill set. Please don't think my labeling him an explicative is too harsh. Read on. We promptly bought one of those door handle covers to contain him. In less than a week, he has mastered that. Half the time I can't open doors with these stupid things on the handles. I think we are going to have to bolt the door at the top. Until then, we will just have to listen for his little voice saying " 'Side" (his way of saying outside) to warn us of his escape.

A Painful Weekend & the Start of School

What a long, painful weekend. I am so glad it is over. I realize to the rest of you it was a three day weekend. To me, it was three days where Tim was working 12 hours each day and we were trapped inside a fair bit due to hurricane Ernesto. But tomorrow is a new day and a school day to boot!

We went to orientation for all the kids last week. Morrigan will start Kindergarten at Crystal Spring Elementary. Since she went to pre-k there last year, she was pretty comfortable with the school. We found out she will be in Mr. Richards' class. When she found out he was her teacher, she ran up & gave him a hug. I have heard great things about him so I was happy she got him. There are also quite a few of her friends in the class so it looks like it will be a great year!

Maggie & Eion will be at First Pres again this year. E has a little boy, Trent, who he knows from the gym in his class. They play well together so that should be fun. Not that I am worried about the little guy. He will be happy to have a whole new room of things to destroy! Maggie is in the 3 year old preschool. She is the only girl in her class but I don't think she will mind. She's bigger than all of them anyway so they can't push her around! Both Maggie & Eion's teachers seem very nice & I think they will have a good time. Or at least I will have a good time being alone!

After Maggie's orientation, she & I went to Target to get some school supplies. While in the shoe area, she found some sparkly red shoes with which she promptly fell in love. She told me, "Those are the most beautiful shoes I've ever seen! Could I please have them?" Being a lover of cute shoes myself, I figured what the hell. She now wears them with everything. (I'll post a picture later. I don't have one & the kids are in bed.) But I have to tell you, I have never seen anyone so happy about shoes. She shows them to people wherever we go and you can tell she feels special in them. Not to mention, her sister doesn't have a pair which makes them invaluable. $9.99 well spent.

Maggie is off to her first day of school tomorrow. Morrigan & Eion start on Wednesday. Full reports to follow!

PS I've posted the pictures of Morrigan's birthday party in the upper Flickr badge.

Rabid River Otters and New TVs

Our tv finally bit it this week. We bought it 9 years ago as an open item return at Best Buy. Pretty much from day one it sucked. When using the remote you had to be right in front of it, the sound was always a bit off etc. But being too cheap to replace it, we endured it for 9 years. (But we did learn a valuable if painful lesson: NEVER buy open item returns or floor samples. You can tell me all you like about the money we would save. I am not interested.) Earlier this week I told Maggie to turn off the tv. She replied that it wouldn't turn off. Naturally, I didn't believe her. Come on now, would you? But when I tried to turn it off, it really wouldn't. The kids thought this was great - perma tv! So we unplugged it. [And I did apologize to the Magpie for not believing her.]

Luckily Arlene was coming the next day to watch the kids so we could go shopping for a new one. She wanted to take the kids to the lake which I thought sounded like a great idea. We packed them off with Arlene & set off to Target. Here is where this tale will disappoint you. Most people replacing a tv these days will upgrade to a plasma flat screen HDTV 50 inch monster. We just couldn't do it. We're really attached to the tv cabinet (read: the ability to lock the kids out of the tv) so we ended up with a 32 inch big tube tv. I felt as though we were buying an 8 track player. Tim was very put out that we had to spend over $200 ($267 to be exact) so we bought the least expensive one at Wal-Mart. Yes we are the proud new owners of an Ilo. Don't worry, we have never heard of it either. But it works and does turn off. While in line to pay for it, I saw the front page of the Roanoke Times: "Rabid river otter attack at the lake." I asked Tim, "Isn't that where we just sent our kids?"